Seeing there wasn´t much happening we decided on a romantic dinner for 2. We had heard Bolivia was going to be cheap but we didn´t expect it to insanely cheap. This will give you an idea of how cheap it is here. Three course meal, free c0cktail and coffee at the end....22 Bolivianos, which is 3 dollars US, which is around 2 quid! Crazy cheap!
You know that saying ´Only in South Africa´ - well it definitely pertains more to Bolivia I reckon! The waiter, a Dave Grohl/Jesus look alike takes your order sitting next to you as if he is your best mate. After that we even saw him bumming smokes off the people sitting next to us! When we asked for our coffee at the end he first went to go have his dinner with his mate, finished his meal then decided to go get our coffee. The place seemed like it was in slow motion.
Our first day in Bolivia was spent waiting around town for a Matt Paterson (Kiwi surfer) we had met traveling. Why we befriended him is another question all together? Any SAFFA worth his weight knows that a Saffa is too cool for a Kiwi! Matt arrived midday and we decided to head out to this island called Isla del Sol (Island of the Sun), a short boat ride from Copacabana. This tiny little island was wonderful. It is so small you can go north to South in a few hours walking.
The day was gorgeous, blue skies and high temperatures. We were swamped as we arrived by 10 young islanders all offering to be our tour guide and carry our bags up the steep cliffface to the hostels! We accepted the help of guys called Alvarro. He was apparently 20 but looked like he was 14! He had about 3 front teeth in total (top and bottom), claimed he was a tour guide and claimed he was fluent in English! He seemed like our best option so we got him and his mates to help us with our bags and accepted his offer to take us around the Island the next day! If you thought Cobacabana was quiet then this place took it to a new level. After dinner and after the sun sets there is literally nothing to do! To back up my point Alvarro explained he was one of 18 siblings. He said one of his mates had over 20 brothers and sisters! We were in bed by seven trying to sleep and decided how we were going to get rid of Paterson. Matt has the amazing ability to snorr and fart virtually simultaneously. Not just ordinary snorring and farting but some pretty loud and intense sounds and aromas! At around 9 we were woken up by people singing, dancing and making a farking a racket upstairs. Was not happy till they decided to come downstairs and wake us up....they were two nice looking Swedish gals. They invited us upstairs for a drinks (circle of Death) with a couple of Aussies, couple of Canadians and a Scot! But alas we quickly ran out of booze and had to go running around this little island in the middle of the night looking for more alcohol. Everything shuts at sun set so we thought we were out of luck until some man overheard us talking, came out, opened up his house and sold a whack of booze! Had quite big evening in the end.
No sleep day cruised round the island with Alvarro. All we can say is it is very pretty as none of us understood a word of what old Alvarro said. First his english was special for lack of a better word.....but more importantly we think he lacked any kind of knowledge of the island....
After a day of exploring the island of the sun (this was without done the island of the SUN), we caught the ferry back to the mainland and bussed it to La Paz. The three hour bus journey cost 10 Bolivians, less than a quid. The guy that sold is the ticket said it was direct to La Paz....."Direct" being a subjective word in Bolivia we suppose! As darkness fell the bus stopped and we were told to vacate the bus (friggin cold and dark dark dark outside) But now the fun starts....we have to board a dodgy little boat suitably named the ´Titanic´. The Titanic was nothing like its namesake to be honest, it was a little pile of junk, capacity probably around 12 persons.....we had maybe 18! Oh and it had no lights! We had to cross this wide, powerful river, with swell so large that it almost made waves! The bow of the "Titanic" was plunging under the swells repeatedly. We were getting thrown around like circus monkeys in literally pitch black. We even started discussing wills for the first time in our lives! We were admittedly scared on that dodge little boat.
We arrived in La Paz, safe and went to Adventure Brew Hostel. Awesome hostel in La Paz central with a micro-brewery on site! Only arrived at 10.30pm....which is what time the city starts pumping! Had a good night out....La Paz is crazy. Night started off by drinking local rum (poured out of literally a plastic petrol tank). Our first night wasn´t a disapointment, had a great time. When you roll in at 10 am you are pretty sure you have had a good time.....Matthew (the kiwi rolled in at 5 pm after falling asleep on a couch in a bar/restaurant - can´t take those kiwis anywhere!)
Monday of the new week was a bit of a scary day to be honest.......there was a massive strike/march on La Paz.....150 000 people marching outside blowing up dynamite. The protesters marched, some of them for weeks from the country to strike! It was a very colourful affair and seemed very organized! Spoke to the travel agent in the hostel and he advised we don't go out and said things could turn really nasty and dangerous. He couldn't really explain what the strike was all about but it obviously had something to do with Morales. We watched it from the comfort of the 4th floor. I thought it was going to get messy when we were sitting watching a DVD and some massive explosions went off...they literally shook the ground. In the end it petered out quite peacefully. For a couple of days after that we couldn´t really book any tours or anything. We had originally wanted to go to the Amazon but Matthew (never trust a Kiwi) "WISELY" suggested we climb Huayna Potosi. He said his bro did it and said it was awesome. In retorspect we think Matts bro was playing a practical joke on us! The climb and the descent was one of the hardest days of our lives, I promise. Read on......really just not a lot of fun!
"TRAINING DAY"
Early start, brekkie and headed straight off to the agency to get picked up. We were the first guys there. Next thing a oke rocks up....nice looking blond dude. Start chatting, we all say we looking forward to the climb, small group should be cool! He goes small group, nah nah nah nah....he is in a group of 10! Where u from, the big question? Please don't say it, please dear Lord! Israel! He said it.....Israelis are the worst backpackers in the world. Some hostels don't allow them in.....they are just painful! How much for a room.....okay, 10 dollars. Does that include a towel? Yes. How much without a towel? Does it include breakfast? Yes it does...how much without the breakfast etc etc. Our Israelis were all staying in 'Kibbutz' just for Israelis. We get into the jeep and the talking starts....phelgm sounds being thrown around everywhere....the leader of the pack of Isrealis speaks in English: can we ask you a question....sure.....more banter.....Hebrew Hebrew Hebrew fills the van....Ghhhhhhh, Ghhhhhh, Shhhhhh..'How much you guys pay?' Can you friggin believe it?´Not where you from? Not what is your name? Not what you been up to in South America? Just no clue! Eventually got up to the training camp. Training was loads of fun....very very cold but good preparation for the mountain. Ugo (the owner) knew the deal and separated us from the Israelis and put us with a cool Canadian couple Roberto and Emily! Very nice people (other than the fact they enjoyed climbing, camping and trekking). Climbing trekking and camping became swear words after our trip up this god forsaken mountain! Had a nice dinner and an early night in a kak little bed. We woke up late following training day, had copious amounts of coffee, cocoa tea, brekkie and played countless games of presidents and a-holes. We were in a happy place, oblivious as to what we had got ourselves into! The calm before the storm we suppose. At around 3 we started our assault on high camp......a mere 2 hours away but you had a big backpack with all your gear, ice axe, ice boots, crampons, snow jackets etc. At the 'camp' (a round tin shack) we had some cocoa tea, soup, noodles and attempted to fall asleep. We were all lying on top of each other, the guides fell asleep farting and snorring like their lives depended on it, you could not move, no pillow......it was the worst 5 hours sleep (if you can call it that) of my life. There was no sleep.... Midnight they woke us up.....We were feeling terrible.... Jules had a fever and me a sore sore neck. We both had headaches that seemed to split our poor little pips into 4! We were feeling ROUGHER than a baboons behind. 1am we set of for the summit in the pitch black freezing cold. One foot in front of the other, no talking, nausea, darkness, coldness, dangerous drop offs either side of you, no breath, freezing (thought frostnip was gonna get guy again), 30m ice walls, Ice everywhere and always pitch black.......The only light coming from you small headlight. We bravely soldiered on right the way to the top. Guy got to 30 meters below the summit and decided not to do the last little bit as it looked FRIGGIN dodgy! Sheer cliff literally! This earned Guy the name 6050 from Matt and Julian. We remember a few things that made it memorable.....looking up at the stars and it was amazing (a-maaaaaaaaaaze-ing trip joke), the view from 6050 was also pretty spectacular! Jules and Mat took some stunners from the top. You reach the summit as the sun is rising.....you are higher then the clouds and the view takes what little breath you have away. All below you the sun lights up snow capped mountains....just for a moment you think all the pain was all worth it. Sum it up: once at the top it was worthwhile, getting there was not fun! Basically NEVER again. If you see us going trekking again above 5000m please ask our Mums to check us into rehab! Made it down to high camp and then base and went home on the worlds longest bus ride.
Again, team Roadtripping the Sphere, aka the ´Worlds worst back packers´ did a great job planning etc. It was Friday night and we were exhausted from the mountain plus we booked the worlds most Dangerous Road the next day so we couldn´t put on our glad rags and squeak some takkie on the dance floor!
"DEATH ROAD"
The Worlds Most Dangerous Road....This name was given to this road by a group of American scientists who did a study on a number of roads all around the world! Great group of people and really nice guide (Dan from South West England). He pretty much scared the living daylights into us from moment one telling us of the horror stories and exactly why it is the most dangerous road etc. It is the worlds most dangerous road cause it has the most deaths/km in the world.When you get to the top you see a sign that says 43 people have been killed on the road this year......Dan then goes, that is wrong, last weekend we had 9 more so it is now 52! First part was on a wide tarred highway....a nice introduction to your bike. Once you get to the worlds most dangerous road your heart is pounding. As we got into it and confidence increased, we started to go a lot faster and we REALLY enjoy it. To give you an idea of the gradient: One rides from an altitude of 4700m to 1700 m in a few hours, with sheer drops of 600m in some cases...We loved the whole day, really was amazing. The drive back up was probably the most harrowing because;
a) you don´t have control of your movements...the bus driver has your life in his hands
b) you look out the window and catch a glimpse of nothing! I cant really explain how high up you really are.....or the views. Sorry, you have to go do it for yourself!
"LOOKING GOOD.....PLAYING BAD"
We also played golf in La Paz on the worlds highest course.....What an amazing golf course. We drove down through the valley of La Paz. As we drove further and further down things got more and more affluent! 4x4´s, massive houses etc. When we arrived at the golf course it was something out of James Bond film. Massive clubhouse, so very colonial, GREEN GREEN fairways in what is a very dry brown area....it was somewhere where you could imagine a few drug lords meeting on a weekday for some cigars, whiskey and discuss the next big deal! We all played pretty bad golf by our high standards but is well worth it! (Panda we think you know who won)
"THE FELLOW INMATES"
Another highlight was visiting San Pedro Prison in La Paz! One of the craziest days of our lives.....rocked up to the prison not really knowing what to expect. Saw two blonde lasses talking to a man, who was quite clearly Kenny (real Cape Coloured looking oke). He took us to the prison entrance where we all signed our names and passport numbers into a book. He then started chatting to Daniel through the gate in sterk Afrikaans. Daniel didn´t sound to happy with things but we were taken in! He was a pretty screwed up dude to be honest! Told us he had a gram of cocaine for breakfast as he had ripped off his entire big toe nail! He showed us that he had and it was not pretty! He sat us down in the second floor of the cell that belonged to a good mate of Pablo Escabar! He got out his computer and played us a bit of Steve Hofmeyer and then showed us a documentary on San Pedro Prison....pretty amazing place is the biggest understatement I have ever made! Place is as bent as Elton John....so uber corrupt it frightens even Bob Mugabe! Basically the prison is microcosm of the world in general. It is total free market economy in there. You have to buy your own cell, you have to have a job if you don´t have money (a show polisher, a guide, a person who gets stuff, you run a store, you mend clothes etc), you can live with your wife and children in the prison ...they can come and go as they please. The only restriction for you is that you have to be at roll call every morning at 7.00 am. There are even elections in the prison for mayors of certain areas of the prison. These mayors control their areas .....ie most people are in there for white collar crimes. Sometimes a rapist or murderer will be put in prison. When this happens they are monitored closely as most the guys in their have wives and kids you roam freely around the prsion. If they step out of line they get killed in the pool (thrown in there and every time they try to surface they have rocks thrown at their head).
Daniel then took us up to the 3 rd floor of Jorge Siaz´s cell where we just rapped for ages. Daniel told us his life story, how he had become a muel, how he was he reckons done over etc. We sit and chat for hours....picking his brain for as many details of the prison. He also told us that there was trouble in the prison as an ex president was in the prison when we were there. He allegedly ordered a village of around 30 Bolivians to be killed! The strike that I mentioned earlier had something to do with this ex president. People speculate as to why he is in San Pedro. The dont know if he is in their for his own safety or for his crimes! Anyways as we were leaving the prsion we couldn´t leave the way we came as there were a group of angry protesters outside calling for this guys head on a plate!
Headed to Oliver Travels (the local) after being safely let out of prison. We all were in need of serious drink as the tour really leaves you a bit edgy! Had a fun night with the girls partying in the hostel! playing drinking games and celebrating our freedom.....We never want to go to prison. But if we had to go....San Pedro would be our 1st choice for sure.
Our next adventure was the Salt Flats in Uyuni! We caught a dodge Trans Omar bus from La Paz to Uyuni. Bus ride from hell. Supposed to leave at 8pm and arrive 7am the following day......that is what they said.(Never catch the local buses always the tourist bus) We arrived at around 1pm the following day. Worst bus ride ever, bumpy as hell! Reason for our delay...well, we were in the desert and the bus broke down. They would try fix it, we would move around 100meters and then stop the bus, someone would jump out the bus, run back about 50 meters to collect our fan belt which kept on dropping out the back of the friggin bus!
"DAVID vs GOLIATH"
We spent the nite in Uyuni and jumped onto a 3 day 4x4 trip through the salt plains and the worlds driest dessert. 8 people in a 4 x 4, very cosy. We did it with 4 Irish girls. The salt flats are pretty amazing......white for as far as the eye can see....to see just how amazing it is, you would have to look at our photos on FB. Words could do it no justice....After we left the salt plains it was into the dessert......now this just involved a lot of driving....and I mean a lot of driving. But perhaps another highlight of this dessert in the salt lakes dotted around the desert swarming with pink flamingos. Who ever said the dessert is freezing at nite.....was NOT lying! So cold that we contemplated sharing 1 sleeping bag to keep warm with body heat. On the last day before reaching the Chile/Bolivia border we stopped of at geysers which were extremely hot and with horrible smells of sulphur....and the highlight hot natural salt springs....We wasted no time climbing in...35 degree water and so good for your skin......
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